Tag Archives: blog

Changes

27 Nov

I’m writing in purple; I’m such a rebel.

Woah, now I’m blue. Didn’t expect that, did you? DID YOU?

There are going to be some changes around TL (Tedious Life’s cool, street name). I’m just going to get right down to it.

1.) I will now use TL when referring to this blog from now on. It is this blog’s street name (as explained above), and we should all respect that.

2.) My street name is Master Jedi DJ Fiddlesticks.

3.) In light of new, confidence boosting events, I will appear more weird (more me) in these posts.

4.) I feel as though I’ve finally found my personal writing voice because (see above).

Onwardeth to more exciting crap…

 I’m going to make TL  look prettier and easier to navigate; I will also blog a bit differently and less frequently because of other writing opportunities I am striving for and I also have no fear of grammar police hence this grammatically incorrect sentence.

The biggest difference will be Friday Flips. I might still write for this blog hop, but less frequently. Twitter and Facebook will not be updated, even though Facebook is already like that.

 Well, that’s it. BYE!

Friday Flips 11/5: The “Mustache Hate” Edition

4 Nov

Yes, I missed last week’s flips. Simply put, I was tired. I was tired of my birthday, tired of planning, tired of being sad when nobody remembered said birthday, and so freakin’ tired of Halloween… so I celebrated with Cesar Chavez instead.

A small amount of hatred goes to my name. My parents thought it was unique but by 5th grade, I hated it because it was so common and it was too innocent sounding. I go by a nickname, instead of Sara, but some people still call me by my real first name.

A shovel of flips goes out to certain bloggers. The bloggers I am referring to are ones that constantly refer to their writing as “funny” or “sappy” or “snarky”. I’m not hating on blogs that do this on occasion I’m talking about bloggers who do that on every single post. Honestly? Your writing isn’t that funny or snarky when you start off by writing “here is my funny/snarky post on my trip to the pumpkin patch.”

 “Friends” who criticize my spelling and grammar deserve some giant flips this week. Am I writing a research paper? I can write better than this, but this is a BLOG. Wud u rther iF i tyPed lyke dis?????????????? Or iF i tweeted lyke dis…

“Yo, jus got bac from da concert. awsum. my dawg died. hehe.”

That’s right, insult my grammar and the dog dies. *

Mustache haters? You get a big “F” in mustachinessness. As you know from my previous post, I love making mustaches on sticks. I now carry one everywhere I go to show friends or to strike up a conversation with the homeless man who lives by the supermarket. I do not know where this “mustache hate” comes from but it needs to stop. I have a mustache on a stick, so what? I’m not pushing it up to your face or anything… Okay, I did that once but I apologized to her afterwards.

Grow up, it is just a mustache! It’s not like it’s a Boba Fett blaster or anything…

A NOT Flip Off to WordPress for these recommended tags…

they know EXACTLY what I'm talking about!

What are you flipping off this week? Also, new username ideas? Anyone?

Click here to visit MommaKiss and the other bloggers who are flipping off today 

*= Just joking, of course. I’m pretty sure that’s illegal and stuff. Also? It’s messy.

Friday Flip Offs 10/15: Evil Feces

14 Oct

No original non-meme posts in three weeks? I would be a bit angry at myself if I didn’t have a post planned for next week… and an awesome party coming up! Seriously, this is how my life has been for about 3 weeks…

I forgot to add "making useless graphs"

As you can see, blogging has been the least of my concerns but that’s not going to stop me with Friday Flip Offs! 

Contacts, you suck hard. I’ve forgotten to taken you out twice this week, and woke up with sudden realization that my 20/20 vision was back and then the sadness that followed. I cried. 😥

America’s Schools, I just realized that you are reason why my vision sucks. You turned me into a Super Reader which really messed up my eyes.  If I ever mistake poison for orange juice, I’ll be suing you. That’s the American way.

Spanish you’ve failed me. All those classes and I still fumble with the easiest vocabulary words. I can’t imagine what those Spanish speakers are thinking of me after I told them, “I’m washing my hands with ham.”

Ham- jamón
Soap- jabón

This is why I will never take that vacation to Spain.

I’m giving an old-fashioned bird flipping to dog poop and Dog. Dog is a dog. He poops; it’s natural. What isn’t natural is the fact that he continues to push after he stands up and the result is crap smeared all over his rear end. He also tries to run away while I round-up a buddy (in today’s case, it was my loving father) to help me clean the crap off my dog’s butt with a moist towel. After we catch him, the cleaning process begins. In summary…

►He gets crap on my shoes.

►He runs off and wipes his shit on the leg closest to him.

►He has this weird look in his eye while I clean him. I think he assumes we’re in a relationship now, but I’m too scared to say no.

Dog’s 13th birthday is coming up, so I would normally associate his ‘pushing’ problems with old age… BUT he does it every time company comes over or I have something important to do. Every. Single. Time.

Who knew that poop could be used for evil?

What are you flipping off this week? Also, what’s the best way to break up with your dog?

 Click here to visit Mommakiss and the other bloggers flipping off today. (Please note that I will be posting this early and will be adding my blog to the linky list on Friday morning.)

Friday Flips 9/24: Morph into Bob Saget already!

24 Sep

Crappidy Crap Crap Crappin’ Crap.

I forgot it was Thursday night. I have flips to write and so much to do. Since when does Friday turn into the busiest day of the week? Isn’t that what Mondays are for?

Papercuts- FLIP OFF! I haven’t gotten a paper cut in a long time so whenever people would talk about the horrible pain, I would secretly think it’s just a little paper cut.

They hurt, bad. I don’t know who to blame for this… paper? The paper company? Obama?

I’ll just blame the Canadians. Dang Canadians, coming into America with their stupid “made in China” paper…

 How I Met Your Mother- FLIP OFF! I hate this show but I can’t stop watching. I find the fact that Neil Patrick Harris is gay but playing a womanizer is intriguing and slightly hilarious.

I’m also trying to find and watch the episode where Josh Radnor morphs into Bob Saget. I don’t know if it’s a quick morph or a slow changing process that happens over several episodes but I think it might be the latter because I’ve started to see more Bob Saget-ty features growing on him as I watch more episodes.

When the Bob Saget transformation is complete, he finally meets the mother? Right? I really hope that’s true because I can’t stand watching this show anymore.

Writer’s Block and my busy schedule- FLIP OFF! I have writer’s block right now and even the small amount of ideas I do have don’t get written down… no time.

I feel so bad that I have TWO Friday Flips posts in a row. I haven’t posted all week and it irritates me more than it should.

I LOVE posting but with the WordPress.org switch (half way there) and school/errands, the blog gets tossed to the end of my to-do list.

I also have a whole new load of tasks. I’m picking up tennis again for the first time in years and I have to design band T-shirts for this awesome band I’m a part of now. We sing songs about eating your veggies and staying in school.

Don’t ask.

Click here to visit Mommakiss and see who else is flipping today.

The First Tedious Life Giveaway!

12 Sep

Okay, so I have an exciting giveaway for you guys.

Anyone who comments on this post automatically wins this GREAT PRIZE

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Commas, commas for everyone!

I really need to get rid of them so take some commas and throw them around.

Wear them as hat or pin.

Wrap lights around a comma and hang it outside your front door to dissuade robbers and Creepy Uncle Bill from lurking.

Hitch a saddle on one and ride it like a horsie.

I’m serious, take my friggin’ commas. See I just used a comma. It’s an epidemic.

I use commas way too much. I almost used one in a sentence like this:

“I just saw a penguin Chris Brown that polar bear and that walrus.”

So it would be written as:

“I just saw a penguin Chris Brown that polar bear, and that walrus.”

That’s when I realized that I have a problem.

Super Kitty- DISTRACT!

These are my comma solutions:

1.)    Use more of these thingys- :

2.)    Use more dashes even when the sentence doesn’t call for it——————————

3.)    Leave some sentences as fragments. It’s the. Internet. Who’s gunna care?

4.)    Attach a picture of a kitty to distract readers while I use commas.

5.)    StArT tYpInG lIkE tHiS tO dIsTrAcT pEoPlE

So take some commas ‘cause I don’t want them anymore.

Note: Is it okay if I say ‘Chris Brown’ like a verb? I don’t think it’s too soon.

Note #2: I’m sure it’s okay now. Urban Dictionary told me so. I love Urban Dictionary. They taught me the proper and polite definition of the word ‘shank’.

Note #3: Is it bad if Google Reader recommends these websites to me?

I don’t follow any Star Wars websites… do I blog about Star Wars that much?

Take my Star Wars blogging and my commas. Please.

Note #4: Google might also be reading my mind to fill out the Recommended Items section. They’re rich and mind reading does come along with the private jet and English butler. So Google took my dog and now they’re stealing my thoughts. This sucks.

Note #5: I had something else to write here but then I forgot. Bye!

Friday Flips 9/3: Me on TV!

2 Sep

Just a short message before I begin Flip Offs…

I’m moving to WordPress.org VERY soon, before the end of September. This means that my website might be down but that’s because I’m moving NOT because I’m dead (but I’ll still take the free flowers). If you have ANY tutorial links or stories about the switch, PLEASE give them to me.

I haven’t felt this scared since a Maltese chased me down the street as a kid… don’t let that cute face fool you.

Twitter- Flip Off! I said that I wouldn’t become a Tweet addict but I feel the addiction coming on. I think I’m just one tweet away from my friends calling in Dr. Phil.

Dr. Phil: So you Tweet over 9 THOUSAND times a day?

Me: Well… you’re bald!

Dr. Phil: Hasn’t this hurt your family?

Me: Maybe if they got on Twitter, we wouldn’t have this problem.

Dr. Phil: I want you to join the Dr. Phil house…

Then, I would decline because I heard that you’re not allowed to gamble in the Dr. Phil house. The producers would wave some money in my face and say I could keep it as long as I joined Dr. Phil house, pretended to be a 12 year old mom*, and wrote a tell-all book about how Dr. Phil house changed my life.

I would accept.

*= Multiple people have thought I was 11 since the time I was 14. I could play a 12 year old mom, no problem.

Dog- Flip Off! You keep asking to go outside and potty but you never go…

 I found out that you have Old Dog Constipation, which is just like Old Man Constipation but Dog is a dog. What are you supposed to do for Old Dog Constipation? Am I supposed to hold a magazine in front of your face for you? I really hope you go so I don’t have to give you some sort of dog suppository because honestly, I will NOT do that for you…

Things I want/need- Flip Off! The list of things I want/need is growing… I need a car, I want a lightsaber, I want a camera…

(On the subject of cameras, did you know that Nikon and Canon are like Mac and PC? I found out when two photography nerds had a granny bitchslap fight in the middle of my local camera store… That is the reason why Star Wars conventions and Star Trek conventions cannot be held at the same location. That’s also why nobody should ask George Lucas if he is a Trekkie, Star Wars fans will feel betrayed and shed tears while the Trekkies will jump with joy. It leads to a geeky granny bitchslap fight, believe me.)

I need to get a REAL job.

WordPress.org- Flip Off! Yeah, you all knew this was coming. This is going to be tough but I hope that I can have the new and improved Tedious Life running by October. I’m so scared…

I’m rambling a lot today and I think this post shows it. I blame my lack of sleep. Now, I’m off to watch a few episodes of Three’s Company…. WEEEEEE!

Click here to visit Momma Kiss and the other Flippers!

Friday Flip-Offs 8/20: Pant Fairies!

20 Aug

I’m so tired. I normally write my Flip-Offs on Tuesday and Wednesday and them I make them look pretty on Thursday before I hit ‘Publish’. I’m so tired that I’m typing these flips and hitting ‘Publish’ in one sitting so please excuse my tirednessness.

Tedious Life- Blog Off! I hate my blog. I was writing a formal paper today for class and I almost turned it into an informal paper on ninjas because that’s what I do here. The wonderful internet allows me to type y’all, asshat, and ballz without being judged while most schools don’t.

Those asshats! They think they’re so fancy with them learnin’ books and number computy thingamabobs.

Pant Fairies- Flip Off! I woke up this morning and found out that Pant Fairies stole my pants.

I had to wear my dirty pants ‘weekend pants’ with holes in both knees. One of my friends suggested that the pant fairies hated my horrible fashion sense and were taking all my fashion felonies. Pssh… I know they are just jealous of my vintage bellbottom jeans.

Pant fairies, return the pants or answer to me.

On a serious note, please tell me if you have any information about what happened to my pants.

Blogs with no search widget- The search widget is the most important part of the sidebar. If I find a great post and remember the name, I want to be able to search and find it again later.

My 2nd Grade Teacher- Flip Off! You always taught me to use, “As you can see” in my essay conclusions. That did NOT help me in the long run. And that yellow card you gave me made me hate you forever. I don’t do yellow cards.

This has been the worst Flip Off post ever but I promise to do better next week. To make it up to you, here’s a hilarious video I found…

No, attempted rape is not hilarious but crazy people are.

I’m so tired that I’m going to bed as soon as I hit ‘Publish’. Comment moderation can wait.

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