Does Your Handwriting Say You’re A Stalker?

29 Mar


—This is an “Analyze This” post, where I analyze something that occurs in your daily life.—

Everyone has a different way that they write. I read an article  and found out there are these people who have a job called “handwriting analysist” (big word, right?) they look at handwriting and can tell what it means- like if you’re outgoing, dishonest, or whatever. I don’t believe that crap, so I’m going to write down what I think handwriting of certain people means.  


What Specialists Say: 

Apparently, how your writng slants says a lot about you. Specialists say that if your writing slants to the right you like to socialize and are very open and if it slants to the left you like to be alone. If your handwriting doesn’t slant at all you are very practical and logical. 

[EDIT] If you’re right handed and slant to the left you like to be a rebel. [/EDIT] 

What I Say: 

If your handwriting slants either way, I’d say you like to takes sides. Right side if the good side and the left side is the not-as-good-but-still-okay side (just think of right and left like Harry Potter and Twilight). If it doesn’t slant, you don’t like to take sides- congrats! 



What Specialists Say: 

If you write really big you might be outgoing and have a big personality. If your writing is small it means your shy and concentrate easy. I don’t know what “concentrate” has to do with anything, handwriting has nothing to do with orange juice! If it is average sized, you are adusted. 

What I Say: 

Big: Is a stalker, big writing is used for stalker notes like “I see you ran out of milk” and “I love your new shampoo.” 

Small: Likes rice 

Average: Normal 



What Specialists Say: 

If your loops on L’s are very tiny or closed you are feeling tense. If the loops on your L’s are very big or wide it means you have no problem showing yourself to the world. 

If the loops on your E’s are very tiny or nonexistant you are skeptical. If the loops are big you like to try new things. 

What I Say: 

If any of your loops are big enough to shove 10 oompa loompas into, you want to go on vacation. If they are only big enough for 5 oompa loompas, you need to express yourself more. If you can shove more than 15 oompa loompas you need to relax. 

Try and figure out what your handwriting says about you. I bet I knew about you through your writing more than those “specialists”, right? After going through all that work to see what your handwriting says here is a picture of a kitty:

**Kitten Photo Credit Goes To Photographer, Click Picture For More**


11 Responses to “Does Your Handwriting Say You’re A Stalker?”

  1. Missygalfun March 29, 2010 at 11:10 pm #

    The specialist said I was an outgoing and expressive and you said I was a stalker who could fit 10 oompa loompas in my e’s. You were right! lol 5 stars

    • Sara March 29, 2010 at 11:12 pm #

      One Word: Mindreader

  2. Amy April 12, 2010 at 7:44 pm #

    What’s handwriting?!?! Oh yeah, I remember that…pencils..pens…nonkeyboard activities. gotcha. well, my handwriting has always frightened me because it’s always so different depending on mood fluxuation. So I think by your analysis I would enjoy the company of a blood-sucking-wand-waving-teenager, be stalking a stranger in a rice field and I could possibly BE an oompa loopma! 😉

  3. Barz April 20, 2010 at 9:41 pm #

    Could specialist analyze me from this comment’s letters??
    I’m doubtful if they could do that…

    Lemme know if they could!

    • Sara April 22, 2010 at 6:10 pm #

      If they could examine the letters on your keyboard I’m sure they would say, “This person is a very boring perfectionist.”

      • Barz April 23, 2010 at 8:09 pm #

        Ahh… was it a compliment or a humiliation?

  4. Sara April 23, 2010 at 8:23 pm #

    A assume the specialist would be insulting the keyboard. They analyze letters, not words. Your keyboard will be very pissed and probably suffer some sort of breakdown. Poor thing 😦

  5. cyber brahmin April 25, 2010 at 6:27 am #

    would be interesting to know what would the experts make out of different fonts we use in writing…while we would worry how to make it attractive they would jot their minds in figuring out the psychology of the letters. Poor souls !
    jokes apart(though I know it wasn’t a laughable joke 😉 ) nice post !
    Do grace my blog sometime with your visit 😛 …. Click here to visit.

  6. adman50 April 30, 2010 at 6:12 pm #

    What does it mean if I have forgotten how to write. I thought writing was dead like T.V?

    • Sara April 30, 2010 at 6:15 pm #

      I know what you mean. I read that article on handwriting and had to look it up on Wikipedia. I think it might be like typing only with wooden sticks and pieces of flat tree. Those crazy old people and their weird inventions!


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